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Mombie

A behavior happens a couple of times and you go about with life, never even noticing that you’ve done it. Then the behavior happens a few more times and still it goes unnoticed. Life is funny that way. The small, mundane, unimportant things get compartmentalized in this automatic part of the brain, and we don’t ever really have to or need to pay attention to it happening, think using turn signals in the car, or flushing the toilet after you go. The thing is, these unimportant, mundane, small things can become a norm, which is then considered a habit. Google defines a habit as a settled or regular tendency or practice, especially one that is hard to give up.

Science has proven that on average new behaviors take approximately sixty-six days to become automatic. A habit, can however, form in as little as eighteen days. Let’s take a look at the flip side of this science. It can also take as many as 254 days for a new habit to form. This means it can take that amount of time to break or reverse a habit.

I am potty trained and crate trained. We have a very stringent nighttime routine. Mom complains about being a super light sleeper, she hears everything. When Mom doesn’t get sleep she turns into a “mombie” and she will take down anything or anyone that crosses her path. One night Dad let us out before bed, which is normal. I discovered that my bunny neighbor left gifties, and right then was to very best time to forage for them, completely dismissing the fact that I was going to be locked up in bed for the next 8 hours. That night there was a problem. I had to go, really go! I barked to let Mom know I couldn’t hold it anymore. She woke up, came into our room, said some bad words, told me “no barking”, and then let me out. I did my business, then proceeded (unbeknownst to Mom) to find more of the tasty morsels the bunny left behind for me. She called me back in, “come Kevin… cookies…”. I ran back to the door, she grabbed a few cookies, gave me one, and put me back into my kennel with the remaining cookies.

Well, between late night bunny nuggets and midnight snacks I had to figuratively “let the dogs out”. I barked to let Mom know that she literally needed to let the dogs out. She repeated the process, cuss, out, poop, cookies, kennel, cookies, “NO BARKING”.

I tried this new behavior again the next night, and the next night, and the next. Mom came in every time. She wasn’t happy about it – remember that “mombie” I mentioned?!? I overheard her say that she couldn’t just let me bark, I would end up waking up Boy. It’s true, if she doesn’t answer my barking, I will bark more, and louder. I formed a new, bad habit, or I was certainly in the process of starting one. Mom is in the process of trying to break this newly formed habit. When Boy goes to his dad’s house, she lets me bark. She does not respond, which is unimaginable. Her only response these days is a booming voice from her room, “enough”,” no barking”.

My point… habits form before you even realize they are happening. They can be tough to break. Pay attention to your little, unimportant, and mundane, behaviors, so they don’t get stored in the automatic section of the brain. BE AWARE of the things you are doing. Live all parts of your life with blatant awareness and intention.

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Poster Child of A Beautiful Day

Fall is here, finally. It has been a wickedly hot summer. Please don’t misunderstand, I completely enjoy basking in the warm summer air on the hot patio stones. I however, have never had the luxury of experiencing anything other than spring and summer. But today… Mom said it was a PERFECT fall day. It’s sunny, about 70 degrees, the wind is blowing, and absolutely no humidity to speak of. It really is the poster child of a beautiful day.

Mom and Dad were supposed to be gone all day, but Boy’s school called and Mom had to pick him up very early. When she got home, she opened all the windows, opened the door, and told us to “get out”. It felt beyond delightful, lying outside in the cool grass with the leaves whirling past me and the tree limbs swaying gently in the breeze. There’s just so much to look at when it is all continually moving.

Fall is a new experience for me. I felt the need to soak in and relish in every refreshing moment of this new experience. I needed to genuinely enjoy the moment I was in. It was vital to take in and appreciate how every tiny little piece of the universe came together perfectly, to create, not just a magical moment, but a joy filled day.

This is my way of telling you, to take notice. Remember to enjoy where you are in a moment. Sometimes, we can be too focused on the wrong parts, or too focused overall, or even too busy. Sometimes these moments can be hard to find and easily missed. Take a pause each day and take note. Find something that brought you joy. It could be an interaction, a gift, a smile, getting a job done, the weather, the whole stinking day. Don’t let those little moments or days of joy pass you by. These are the things worth spotlighting.

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Lie Down and Die Because All Your Dreams Are Coming True

I love others. I love dogs, I love people, I love kids, heck, I even love cats. EVERYONE! I haven’t met a face (or tail) that I didn’t want to know better. Mom took note of this very early on. There’s this process, or maybe a better word would be a display, to how I attempt to greet a new friend. I sort of arch my back, wag my tail profusely, my ears fall flat to my head to the extent that they are lost in a pile of fluff, and sometimes, just sometimes, I shout in excitement. This is my reaction to anyone and mostly everyone, consistently. Whether they want to be my friend or not; I want to be theirs.

Now that I am all healed up from surgery, I am allowed to go on walks around the neighborhood to meet new friends. Mom said daycare was a good idea too. This is mostly because everyone at home works and schools during the day. Even though Scrappy and Lola are home, it doesn’t mean they want to be “pestered” by me. Mom kept telling me I was going to meet a whole slew of new friends both the furry and peoply type when I went to daycare. How exciting! She said I had to take a test. She also said she knew I’d do well, she just knew it.

Then came testing day…

Mom and I were locked in a room with a window. Mom filled out some papers, then lifted me to see what was on the other side of the window. There were all sorts of big dogs running after balls, lying in front of fans, and tugging at each other. This is daycare?!? Why don’t they just call it “Lie Down and Die Because All Your Dreams Are Coming True”? A woman walked in, they talked for a long time (they clearly knew each other). Then the woman grabbed my leash and escorted me through another door. I was hesitant. I put on the breaks and mom tucked my fluffy tail under my body and gave me a push. The lady picked me up and the door closed. Where was I heading? I didn’t like it. The lady carried me the entire way, but once she put me down, I was in a new room with a menagerie of dogs and puppies. They were my size and there were also human friends – two of them.

HOLY COW!!! I was overjoyed! I checked out every dog in the place. Some barked a lot, some were sleeping, some were playing, and a person girl was carrying one. I introduced myself to everyone with a sniff to the face or rear, in my usual “how you doin” posture. I met some interesting individuals. One guy snapped at me, Meany! One guy sniffed me back, another watched me, and then….

I found her. I think she might be my new best friend. Her name is Charlie. She is also five months old, she is black and white all over, and a pittie mix. The only sad part about that is that if she gets too big or too rough she will be sent to the big dog room and we won’t be able to be buddies anymore. Too sad to think about, back to today.

I sniffed her, she sniffed me back, I pranced, she followed, I stopped, she stopped. When Charlie took a break to scratch an itch, I helped her, she didn’t mind the help. This is going to be the beginning of something wonderful. I can feel it!

I gave everyone a chance today. Every. Single. Dog. They were all given the same opportunity to accept or decline my friendship. I certainly wasn’t well received by everyone, remember the guy I told you about? Meany? I learned quite a few lessons today.

  1. Not everyone will like you. That’s OK. I am going to repeat this simply because it needs to be understood. Not everyone will like you and that’s OK! I am authentically me and that might not be everyone’s strip of rawhide. This guy in class not being my friend didn’t affect the fact that I had a great experience. It also didn’t affect the fact that I still made a friend. He didn’t like me, so what?!?
  2. You have to give everyone and I mean everyone a chance. If I stopped at Meany, I wouldn’t have met Charlie or anyone else for that matter.
  3. Once someone shows you who they are, believe them. Meany is clearly a good guy, he passed the same temperament test I did. There was something about me that he just didn’t like. His nip was a warning; if there is something I know, it’s you only get so many warnings before the explosion. So I believed him. I believed that he would be aggressive, he told me, and I listened. He showed me exactly who he was and where I stood with him. Listen to that warning, or red flag, or whatever you call it.

Today, well, it wasn’t a bust. I walked away with a new place to play, a few new friends, some freedom from home, and some pretty incredible lessons. Oh, and after daycare, the naps are amazing. Who could ask for more?!? I can’t wait to go back!